Saturday 15 October 2011

Don't Believe The Mask, It Adapts To Any Lie

Good evening children.
Welcome to Bacon Tasty, a new blog from myself and Mr Cruickshanks. We'll be covering a variety of topics, generally split between us.

I'll be covering politics, current events, religion and shit that makes me laugh. I'll also be recommending music/films/tv you should really watch. In essence, I'm trying to make your life better. You know. Yes, you, you ungrateful sods. Try to pay attention, you at the back. I'm not doing this for my own fucking benefit. I'm just one man, one lonely soldier trying to make a difference. Or something. Whatever.

Billy (Archnomad) on the other hand, will be covering gaming posts, regarding, well, just about anything with a rules structure that society looks down on us for playing. Also, you know, other shit he finds floating about the internet that you really should pay attention to.

Anyways, my first post is entitled "Don't Believe The Mask, It Adapts To Any Lie".
As such, this post is about David Cameron.

This has been inspired by a recent Strathclyde University think tank (CERS), which published a report showing that more people think the Conservative Party is most likely to "find out what voters want" and then be "willing to change what it stands for to meet these demands".

This, shows precisely why David Cameron is, well, a cunt. Prior to the last election, he would do or say absolutely anything if he thought there was even the slightest chance people would be inspired to vote for him. To paraphrase Charlie Brooker, if there was a poll released tomorrow morning which showed 75% of British people supported child rape, Cameron would be in an open topped bus, driving round London with a sack of five year olds and a catapult by lunchtime.

He had absolutely no political morals. Nothing. The man is a political chameleon. He'd have backed anything to help him get into power. His party were all but promising voters the shirts off their backs if their vote went Tory.

Course, now he's in power, he's proven to be a fairly old school Thatcherite. But now, he's having to duck and dodge and distance himself from those members of the Party who have the temerity to follow his orders to their logical conclusion. Selling off all the forests, that went well, didn't it? He's having to apply every whit of political cunning he has to avoid looking like the prick he is.
Telling us all to clear our credit card debts in the middle of a recession he's not making any better? Aye, piss off Dave.

After 17 months of the economy juddering along at rock bottom, it might be an idea to change your policies, rather than tell us to make a fucking change, you millionaire fuck.

Ahem. That got heated.

So, where was I? Oh aye, a report announcing that the Conservatives are now seen as more likely to change their policies to conform to public opinion. Course they are. They'd give a tramp a blow job if he promises to vote Tory. Well, not right now, because due to the fantastic way our democracy works, they can do what they like for the next four years and we can't do a damn thing about it.

But the really funny thing about this report? The survey also shows that "voters are reluctant to vote for a party if they think it is highly willing to change its mind to fit in with public opinion."

So. Voters don't like a party of highly changeable flibbertigibbets who are seen as liable to change their policies as we are to change our underwear. The Tories are finally seen as the "listening party", the party who cares what people have to say and now it turns out that people ain't a fan of a party of no-spined whores.

It's wonderful. Genuinely wonderful. It's also fucking funny that Tories think this report is a good thing: "Yay, we're finally the party who listen to people!"
Yeah guys. Read the rest of the report. People still don't respect you.

I haven't mentioned the Lib Dems cause I mostly just feel sorry for them.


I think that basically sums up my point. Uh, anything else I wanted to say? Oh, kudos if you recognise the song the post title is from. If you've liked this post, great, if not, oh well, I imagine I'll deal with the disappointment somehow. Tune in for Archy's stuff, he writes about games and shit. There's usually less anger in his posts. Usually.

Uhm...anything else? Don't think so.

EDIT: Bastard, of course there was something. Link to the article I've been referencing: http://www.strath.ac.uk/features/archive/cers/

Welcome to the blog guys. Hope you like it.

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